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Am Dm Am
There are Russians int the front yard, there's Martians on the ceiling
Dm Em Am
There's a Cape buffalo on the patio and you ask me how I'm feeling
Dm Am
There's a sniper by the swingset, the highway has been mined
Dm Em Am
Then here you come with a great big smile singing, rise and shine
Chorus
Am Em Am
Well, there's nothing you could say that will get me up today
Dm Em
Nothing you have ever said that can drive me from this bed
Am Dm Em
You can call me lazy, crazy, call me stupid, I don't care
Am Dm Em Am
I ain't gettin' up, cause its dangerous out there.
Am Dm Am
There's a hunter from New Jersey in my kitchen drinking beer
Dm Em Am
There's a Texan out my window with a chainsaw and a lear
Dm Am
I could take a walk around the block to shake me from this slumber
Dm Em Am
But there's student drivers out today and one has got my number
Am Dm Am
There's a pounding on my front door its enough to make me scream
Dm Em Am
Why, its two girl scouts, one Jehova's Witness and a whole SWAT team
Dm Am
So listen to me, darling. Please heed these words I say
Dm Em Am
Its too scary here in February dear, set my snooze alarm for May
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